Sunday, 7 July 2013

Soy sauce buttie, anyone?

I will be losing my hair in 13 days. When it gets snipped off it will be going to these lovely people who provide real hair wigs for children who have lost their own hair.

But it got me thinking – if I wasn’t doing that, what else could I use it for?  So off I went to Google:

First question: why are so many people curious about human urine. Nope, actually, don’t want to know. Not entirely sure you’re going to want to know what else I found out but here they are – uses for human hair arranged in increasing order of how much they made me retch.

6.            Let’s start with the normal. Wigs made of human hair.  Naturally blond hair is the most expensive. Then red, then brown. Gee, I feel special.

5.            Slightly less usual – human hair can be used to help people grow food – it’s woven into mats to prevent weed growth and protect plant roots. That’s kinda cool.

4.            As pest repellent. Bags of human hair around a vegetable plot are meant to keep pests like deer and rabbits away. Either because of the smell or they’re just plain weirded out by it. I know I would be.

3.            If I’d lived in Victorian times, I could have embroidered a hankie with my own hair and given it to my loved one. Try that now and I’m not sure I’d still have a loved one. Mind you, if the shock of blowing their nose with actual body parts induced a coronary, I could remember them by wearing a lock of their hair in a pendant. Yum.

2.            Voodoo. Hair, fingernails, anything personal gets attached to the Voodoo doll. If you want to know more, Google is your friend. I won't be.

1.            In food. Yeah, gonna say that again. In. Food.  Or at least it used to be, although not necessarily here.  Hair contains an amino acid which can be used as a flour improver. Or in soy sauce.  It’s food number is E920. Apparently it gives things a ‘meaty’ taste. Thankfully a little further research shows that E920 is now synthetically produced so the next sliced white you pick up shouldn’t need a shave. Still might give it a miss for a while…

Thursday, 27 June 2013

In 23 days, I’ll be shaving my head. 21 inches of hair down to none at all. It’s generated more questions than you’d think.  

These, for example:

1.      You’re what?
I’m shaving my head.

2.      You’re what??
I’m. Shaving. My. Head.

3.      What for?
Because Claire House needs £6,500 every single day to keep doing what they do.

4.      But why shave your head?
I have very little spare time and even less spare cash. I do have a lot of hair and I’m hoping people will donate a shed load of cash to see me cut it off.

********** ***BIG HINT**************
\/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/

/\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\ /\
********** ***BIG HINT**************

5.      Aren’t you brave?
Nope. Excited…terrified... exified!

6.      What if your head’s a funny shape?
I’ll buy an odd shaped hat.

7.      What if you find a ‘666’ tattoo on your scalp?
It’s not on my scalp.

8.      Are you sure?
Yup. Defo not on my scalp. Oh, the shaving thing? Sure or not – it’s happening!

Claire House Children's Hospice

Claire House is all about laughter, positivity and care.

Located on the Wirral, the hospice provides respite, end-of-life and bereavement care for children and young adults with complex medical needs. They're also there to support the whole family, providing support and counselling for as long as is needed.

Their specialist nursing team also works in the community through their Hospice to Home scheme, which offers care and support in the family home.

They look after families from across Merseyside, Cheshire, North Wales, West Lancashire and the Isle of Man and provide a home-from-home environment for their children and young people, helping enrich their lives so they can live them to the full. During their stay at Claire House, each child has at a minimum of one-to-one care. They can spend time in a hydrotherapy pool, enjoy a music therapy session, sing karaoke, or take part in arts and crafts therapy. 

The whole family can be there with them, with private bedrooms and a lounge for Mum and Dad to unwind and take a break from their role of carers. 

I can't think if a better reason to lose a couple of feet of keratin. If you agree, then the Just-Giving link is below.